Meet Dr. Seltzer: The Wizard of Whopping Whangs

By: Jessi Minneci

When it comes to achieving a pulsating pecker, we understand the frustration and struggle. And if your John Thomas is oftentimes less than thriving, it’s safe to say you’re not alone. In fact, research suggests that one in every five men will experience erectile dysfunction throughout their lifetime – that’s 20 percent of the male species. Seriously, millions of men suffer through the pains of male enhancement on a daily basis. And while a flaccid phallus isn’t necessarily life threatening, it definitely has its sore spots, affecting a man’s:

  • Identity
  • Self-worth
  • Self-confidence
  • Relationships
  • Career
  • Social life

…Need we go on? Unfortunately, penile problems aren’t limited to our peckers. They can seriously affect our overall quality of life.

No, your dong isn’t (fully) damaged

Some guys can get an erection as quickly as they can tie their shoes. Others can’t. In all honesty, growing your penis 180-degrees toward heaven involves a complex process of events that can easily go terribly wrong.

For starters, erections start in the brain. Mental stimulation is followed by a burst of a chemical called nitric oxide which carries messages to red blood cells that enlarge and carry blood to the peen. Without going any further, doesn’t that just sound like a difficult progression?

On the bright side, there are a number of remedies, including natural male enhancement supplements, to help combat common issues that impact our cock capabilities. But with so many brands and “guaranteed” solutions on the market, how can you differentiate the reliable retailers from the straight up… err… pricks?

Debunking the junk for your junk

Sure, there are tons and tons of male enhancement supplements – some that you can even grab at the corner gas station. But do you even have the slightest clue of what you’re taking?!

We’re not dicking around. Without pointing the finger (we’re no tattle tales), a recent study of a popular supplement turned out to contain counterfeit Cialis® (tadalafil) AND diabetes drugs that can be deadly if used incorrectly.  A similar combination killed more than a dozen men in Asia in 2009.

Take a deep breath; we’re not trying to scare you.

We’ve got your back – and your boner, so to speak.  Dr. Seltzer’s offers an all-natural product derived from ingredients that you can actually pronounce. Essentially, we’re the all-natural male enhancement gurus, and we want your story to go something like this:

Boy meets girl. Girl falls for boy. Boy takes girl home. Boy washes down a Dr. Seltzer’s Hard-On Helper supplement. Girl and boy have deep, meaningful conversation for one to two hours. Boy takes girl to bed with a major hard-on. Boy and girl have Earth-shattering sex. Boy and girl live happily ever after.

Who is Dr. Seltzer, anyway?

Classic playboy and gentleman, Dr. Seltzer did what any good man would do after retirement from the hangover industry – moved on down to South America, where the babes are just as hot as the sizzling sun.

But while the honeys came by the handful, boners were not as bountiful. You see, with age (and masculine wisdom) undoubtedly comes shrinkage. More or less, to fully enjoy the relishes of retirement, Dr. S was looking for a fast-acting male enhancement pill that didn’t have the side effects of prescription drugs … AND that he didn’t have to take every day.

The Doc lived in the rain forests of Panama and consulted with local herbalist and native Indians in throughout the continent and very remote areas of the world looking for the holy grail of aphrodisiacs. Low and behold, with dedication, knowledge, and the determination to have mind-blowing sex, Doctor Seltzer’s Hard-On Helper (HOH) was born.

What makes HOH so great?

I don’t know about you, but I can’t handle whiskey hangovers the way I used to be able to in college; let alone supplement hangovers. Forget the headaches, jitters, nausea, lackluster sex, and regrets that come with any-old male enhancement supplement, the only side effect of HOH is… well… a massive hard-on.

Dr. Seltzer’s unique formula contains superior-quality, ultra-pure source materials, and incorporates the latest scientific research to deliver a satisfied schlong. Without getting too crazy, just take a look at some of our ingredients:

  • Red Ginseng: an aphrodisiac powerhouse. Used to combat impotence, infertility, and premature ejaculation, it normalizes blood pressure while rejuvenating and revitalizing the body.
  • Chinese raspberry: associated with the liver and kidney, Chinese raspberry tones and stabilize the kidneys, preserve vital energy, and treats a variety of urogenital conditions, ranging from enuresis and frequent urination to impotence.
  • Wolfberry Fruit: increases levels of androgen, a male sex hormone. Also used to treat many health conditions, including early-onset diabetes, anemia, vision problems, and impotence.

Surprised that you can pronounce everything? You shouldn’t be. One common misconception: a quality product that works doesn’t have to contain a bunch of foreign, mumbo-jumbo ingredients. For a closer look at all of our all-natural components, click here.

You and your willy will feel wonderful

“If there is a product to rival the success of sliced bread… Dr. Seltzer’s Hard On Helper has nailed it!”

That’s a direct quote from one of our many satisfied customers. You see, at Dr. Seltzer’s, it’s our mission to provide an effective, all-natural male enhancement product in a professional, honest, and forthright manner. We will never be sketchy, we will never cheat on you, and we will never do your willy wrong.

Unfortunately, the male enhancement industry can be quite shady – with straight-up crap ingredients, fillers, broken promises, and super sketchy business models. We, on the other hand, deliver a product that is completely safe to take, with an all-natural herbal blend of all ingredients that have no known side effects. ZERO. None!

So, are you ready to get it on? We guarantee this will be the start of a long-lasting friendship.

Just remember – we’re not responsible when your partner starts begging for rounds three, four, five, six…. You get the picture!

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